Wednesday, October 25, 2017

When you don't care enough to spam the very best...

I remember back in the 80s, Hallmark greeting cards had an ad campaign that went, "Hallmark.  When you care enough to send the very best."  

Here's an ad from 1983, although that campaign went on for many years.

I think greeting cards have kind of gone out of style.  Everyone's on the Internet nowadays and they send e-cards by Jacquie Lawson (or, at least I do).  But people are still sending shit.  If you hang around on social media for any length of time, you will no doubt eventually see a spammy attention whoring post like the one below...

I've seen this one several times.

Can I just go on record to say that I hate these kinds of posts?  First off, it lays a guilt trip.  People who don't respond with "done" and fail to copy and paste this piece of crap are evidently not "real friends".  Secondly, the person who copied and pasted this poorly formatted stuff didn't actually write the words themselves.  They either fell victim to the shaming or they actually believe in it themselves.  If you really think of me as a friend, whether or not I respond to your stupid copy/paste spam demands is not going to make a lick of difference.  True friends don't ask their friends to prove they like them by sharing other people's poorly conceived Facebook posts.

Listen, I hate cancer as much as anyone does.  I've lost two beloved dogs to cancer.  My mom has had it.  Several friends and relatives have had it and a few have died from it.  So of course I think it's important to bring awareness to cancer and, if prayer is your thing, I think you should pray for anyone suffering from cancer.  Certainly you should offer help and comfort to them if they want or dneed it.  But sharing this kind of shit isn't effective.  What purpose does it serve?  At best, it's "armchair activism", which really doesn't amount to a hill of shit.

The end of the post mentions empathy, and reads "If you need anything, don't hesitate to call me, I'll be there for you."  And yet, the person sharing this 1. didn't write it themselves, and 2. has either fallen prey to or resorted to friend shaming and guilt tripping.  How can I trust that the people who share this bullshit would actually be there for me if I needed them?  They can't even take the time to compose their own Facebook posts.  They also DEMAND that I perpetuate this silly trend or else I'm an asshole with no compassion.  

Here's another thing.  I would never post something like this on Facebook because 1., I prefer to write my own posts, and 2., I can't stand reading poorly written, badly edited, and unformatted crap like this.  I wonder if the original poster has heard of paragraph breaks.  What about commas and semicolons?

I see someone has made a Facebook page for this annoying phenomenon.  I might actually like the page, but that in and of itself seems kind of like a stupid thing to do.  Why not just stop trying to insist that your "friends" copy and paste stuff on their Facebook wall to please or prove themselves to you?  Stop asking them to type "done", "amen", or "yes".  You post your shit on Facebook and I'll post mine, and I'm sure everything will work out just fine!  

Lest you think I don't have a heart... I really do.  But if I have to prove to you I have a heart by sharing this kind of stupid bullshit, then perhaps we should re-evaluate our friendship.


  1. I hate those posts, too. They remind me of chain letters from the past that promised you bad luck if you broke the cain and failed to forward the letter on to seven or thirteeen or however many people.

  2. I don't have enough time in the day to even read that shit!


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