Wednesday, May 31, 2017

People annoy me...

I'm feeling rather snarky this morning, so here's a top ten list of Facebook "personalities" who annoy me.  Here we go-- in no particular order.  Sorry in advance for all the swearing...

10.  People who feel like Facebook is their platform for "setting a good example".  It's annoying when people post preachy, sanctimonious diatribes about how other people ought to conduct themselves, especially if they do so with holier than thou or religious overtones.  Yes, God bless you, I know you're dealing with special trials that have somehow given you more insight into how how shitty other people are.  I can do without the syrupy melodrama, though.

9.  People who try too hard to be cool, especially if they are aggressive about it.  There's a woman who recently arrived in Stuttgart and, over the past few months, she's tried so hard to show everyone how "cool" she is.  But she's obnoxious and overbearing and needs to STFU more often.  She also needs to learn what "passive aggression" actually is before she accuses other people of it.

8.  People who get involved in political discussions and type in all caps.

7.  The same people who type in all caps are moronic idiots who don't vote and then say things like "NO ONE CAN FORCE ME TO VOTE."  And then it becomes clear that they shouldn't vote because they've proven they're not very bright, anyway.

6.  People who tell other people what or how they should post on other people's Facebook pages, especially if the person they're telling is another "friend".  Why take it upon yourself to tell a person's fellow Facebook friend not to post in all caps if it's not your page?  If all caps annoys the host, let him or her sort it out.  It's not your concern.

5.  While were at it, people who make a request and then add a "thanks" at the end.  For example, "Please don't type in all caps.  Thanks."  Fuck you, and your "thanks in advance."  What if I don't want to stop typing in all caps?  What if I've had eye surgery and can't otherwise read Facebook's tiny print.  You post your way and I'll post mine, motherfucker.

4.  People who...  aw fuck it.  Presumptuous people.  For example, someone who posts a comment like "Heh... I can 'tell' you're upset!"  No, asswipe, I'm not "upset" about your comment.  I am upset that I'm thousands of miles away from you and you think you know how I feel.  Shut the hell up and leave the mind reading to the professionals.

3.  Perpetual ass kissers.  Thankfully, there aren't too many of these on my friends list.  It does annoy me, though, when someone is too eager to be friends with me and acts more like a "fan" than a friend.

2.  Annoying blahgers.  Oh... yeah, if I were reading my posts, I'd probably annoy myself.

1.  Overly helpful people.  Oh man... I do get pissy when someone strokes their ego by offering unsolicited advice.  I really could rant about this right now, actually.   I think I will.  It will help me blow off some steam.

The other day, Bill and I were on our way to the store and I remembered Ms. Overly Helpful, who once used to get regularly bitched about in my blog.  I finally blocked her a few years ago because I just couldn't take her passive aggressive little digs anymore (having endured them for years).  Just talking about her got me riled up; but then, I don't claim to be a very laid back person.  I wish I had a thicker skin.  Scratch that-- my skin is plenty thick with adipose tissue.  I just wish it had fewer nerve endings.

Anyway, Ms. Overly Helpful was basically this smug bitch who used to communicate with me with the most annoying, condescending overtones.  She'd feel free to send me emails and private messages, sometimes with unsolicited advice.  More than once, she actually scolded me in a private message.  When I finally decided to oust her from my online world, I knew I'd get an email demanding to know why.  And she didn't disappoint.  I don't actually think about her much anymore and I don't really miss her at all.  Sometimes, she pops back into relevance when someone does something that reminds me of her.

Yes, I will admit, I am full of angst right now.  I keep looking at the calendar and realizing that some big changes are about to happen and I have little to no control over my life.  We're either going to stay where we are and Bill will start a new job with a new company or we're going to move and Bill will start a brand new job with the government.  There are pros and cons to both situations.  I know Bill really wants the Italy job, but the timing and salary may not work out.  And I love Italy, but I hate moving, especially in such a tight timeframe.  This move probably wouldn't suck as much as our move from Texas to Germany, but it would definitely be annoying and expensive (even if the government gives us a living quarters allowance).

I guess writing a top ten list of annoying people on Facebook is one way to take my mind off of the angst.  And I do realize that there are people out there who have real problems.  Take, for instance, Olivia Newton-John.  She just announced that the breast cancer she had suffered from in the past has now recurred and spread to her sacrum.  Hell, take Bill's co-workers.  Bill, at least, has another option besides staying here and working for a contractor.  Most of his buddies don't even know if they're going to be hired by the new contractor.  In fact, neither does Bill.

And... on top of all of this, we are planning to go to Scotland in September.  It's likely Bill won't be able to come with me.  But as I was sitting here, thinking of what I'll do if he doesn't go with me, I realized that it's entirely possible that he'll have to go TDY or something.  And I realize that I have really lost a lot of my autonomy.  It would probably be good for me to go on this trip alone.

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