Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Self-control... or, family members who aren't friends.

I deleted one of my cousins off of my Facebook friends list yesterday.  As I write that, I feel kind of stupid.  I am certainly old enough to remember when Facebook didn't exist.  Now it's like my whole life revolves around it and other social media platforms.  There was a time when I didn't see or talk to my relatives for years.  Now I can see them anytime on Facebook and that's bringing me down.

This unfriending action was brought on by my post about the woman who called me a moron because I pointed out that Donald Trump's proposed wall at the Mexican border would be very expensive to build and maintain.  She claimed that the money saved by illegals being kept out would make the wall pay for itself.  I thought that sounded like bullshit and said so, although not in those words.  I believe my comment was a simple "Nope."  And for that, I got called a moron.  My initial comment wasn't even directed at her, either.  She simply decided I needed a good schooling about "them damn undesirable illegals".

I decided to vent about being called a moron on my Facebook page.  The thread was going pretty well, with most people playing nice and being funny.  Then an unexpected political shitstorm argument started.

My cousin, who is a Trump supporter (and one of Uncle Dickhead's sons), decided to chime in with his opinions about the wall, which he thinks is a good thing.  As usual, his tone was overbearing and condescending.  I told him so.  I let him know that I wasn't interested in arguing with family members about politics because it was unlikely that either of us would change the other person's mind.  I asked him to argue somewhere else.

Another cousin had a more reasonable discussion with me about the wall.  I didn't enjoy the discussion much, but at least he was willing to listen to me and respond with a modicum of respect.  The other cousin is just very heavy handed with his opinions.  Moreover, we don't do a lot of conversing anyway, unless it's about some topic that he wants to argue about.  So yesterday, three days after that thread was started, he came back and left me a comment letting me know that he was responding because my stuff was showing up on his Facebook timeline.  In other words, it's MY FAULT that he sees this stuff because until yesterday, we were Facebook friends; therefore, he has the right to keep yammering away for as long as he wants to.

I sat there dumbfounded for a minute.  I mean, this guy has a master's degree and he apparently doesn't know that he has options on controlling what shows up on his Facebook feed.  He could have hidden the post.  He could have decided to unfollow me.  He could have unfriended me.  Or-- here's a thought-- he could have been a grown ass man, exercised a little self-control and restraint, and either not responded at all or taken a less contentious tone.

I have seen some of the nasty political arguments this guy has hosted on his own Facebook page.  A lot of them involve people from his mother's side of the family.  They are apparently a lot more liberal than he is, but they are no less opinionated or obnoxious.  I don't want that shit on my page.  If it does erupt, I don't want it going on for days on end.

So... when my cousin came back yesterday with more pro-Trump drivel and started his comment by blaming ME that my stuff was on his Facebook timeline (which he apparently doesn't know how to manage), I decided enough was enough and I deleted him.  I figure we won't be going to Thanksgiving again anytime soon anyway.  And I'm getting to the point at which I'm pretty tired of a lot of the shit that comes from my family.  It causes me stress.

My initial post on Facebook, which was really about being called a moron simply because of my comment that the wall will cost money, ended up digressing into pointless arguments about Trump's stupid wall with someone who is my relative, but obviously isn't a friend.  How sad that is.

Our president is such a gentleman.

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