Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Popping in for a quick vent...

Yet another extremely TMI post.  Proceed with caution.

So, I have been sick as hell all week.  I start coughing and pretty soon, I'm leaning over the toilet throwing up.  Sometimes it gets violent enough that I need Depends.  That happened today.  But before that happened, I was lying on my freshly laundered sheets.  I had just taken my last dose of Delsym, which is a very effective cough suppressant that has some unfortunate side effects that I'll get into in a minute.

Zane, my assloaf beagle who is causing me much angst lately, was butted up against me, taking up a lot of space.  All of a sudden, I get a private message from a new "friend" on Facebook.  This woman has recently moved to the area and will be living in my town.  She's looking for support.  I don't mind being supportive, but I really don't know her very well at all and felt kind of obligated to friend her, since she was suggested to me by someone I know offline.  I hate it when people play Facebook friend matchmaker, by the way.

Before today's message, I literally had exchanged maybe one message with this person.  She sent me a message saying she was moving to my town and was looking for support.  I welcomed her to the neighborhood.  That was it.  I didn't hear anything more from her until today, after I took Delsym so that I might stop coughing.

And... I happened to be trying to enjoy a little afternoon daydreaming, if you know what I mean.  I hoped to release some healing endorphins and maybe kill some time with a few moments of pleasure.  But Delsym can be a disaster on a person's ability to orgasm.  I was just starting to remember this-- there was a time when I went through many bottles of Delsym when Bill and I first married because I had untreated asthma-- and I get this private message from this woman who wants to get together this weekend for lunch.

Now... first off, if you've been watching me on Facebook or reading this blog, you know that I'm sick and have been all week.  This lady is now a Facebook friend, so she could have seen that I'm sick, but probably didn't bother to look.  Secondly, she wants to get together on the weekend for lunch... and that's time I spend with Bill, who works all the fucking time.  And thirdly, I was trying to masturbate, for Christ sakes!  And I was having a difficult time of it, thanks to the Delsym side effects.  She didn't know what I was doing, but it was still an intrusion just the same.

This is not something I do everyday.  Now that I'm in my mid 40s, my libido is not what it was.  And again, I should have waited until later to take the Delsym, since it's not unlike Prozac when it comes to sexual side effects.  It kind of makes having an orgasm a lost cause.

I think I'm feeling really crabby, though, because I'm slowly getting over this illness, but not fast enough.  And even when I'm feeling good, I am leery about hanging out with people I don't know well.  I'm probably more introverted than I seem.  Anyway... it was not a successful venture on any level.

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