Sunday, July 12, 2015

You were doing so well until...

Today's post is going to include frank discussion of the so-called "c-word".  I am calling it such only once for those who are squeamish about a certain slang word that refers to a part of a woman's anatomy.  If you don't like that word, I strongly recommend that you move on to your next stop on the Web. 

Still with me?  Good.

Last night, I read an interesting post about a beautiful plus sized woman who dared to wear a bikini in public.  This is not the first time I've read such an article.  A lot of heavy women are bucking trends and wearing whatever they want in public.  And I think that's just great if it works for them.  Other people disagree and leave fat shaming comments on these posts.  It never fails.  There are always at least a few in the bunch who steadfastly insist that women over a certain size should not wear certain types of clothing.  And they almost always throw in some comment that it's not about what heavy women look like.  They are simply "concerned for their health".

Now, I am pretty much convinced that most of the fat shamers out there are not, in fact, concerned about anything but what makes their crotches stir.  They are not interested in anyone's health status.  They just find fat people offensive and prefer not to look at them.  It's more acceptable to couch that complaint in fake concern for another person's health than it is to simply say, "I think you're ugly and need to cover up and/or go away.  I don't want to have to look at you."

So, last night, some guy made a fat shaming comment about the woman who was not supposed to be wearing a bikini.  What he said was not so bad.  I've seen much worse (like, for instance, the guy who asked "If you were a man, would you 'bang' her?").

Anyway, this is what he said... and again, it's not that offensive.

Want an attractive bikini body? Work out and eat healthy .

Naturally, someone called him out for that comment.

What is your definition of attractive? Is it the size of a waist or the worth of a person? You are a child and have no understanding of anything so you should try again. Cunt.

I couldn't help but appreciate that irony of that comment.  Here this guy was, sticking up for the plus sized lady in the bikini.  I thought that was just great.  But then he goes and calls the other guy a "cunt".

I don't usually comment on stuff like this because there are too many idiots out there who can't discuss things rationally.  But I did feel compelled to leave a comment about how I thought using misogynistic language defeated the purpose of calling someone out for being a fat shamer.  Some folks expressed their agreement in the form of "likes", which I thought was very fine.  But then some people took issue with the fact that I think the term "cunt" used as an insult is misogynistic.

So I left another comment.

Look, I love my cunt... It gives me much pleasure. But it's basically a word that means big stinky vagina. Since men don't have them and it's a term used to insult people, it is a rather misogynistic word. Now... Had Mr. Blackburn not used it in an insulting way, I might not have thought his comment was that ironic. He could have said, "Look at the beautiful, fragrant, majestic cunt on that woman." I might not have considered that very insulting or misogynistic. That's not what he said, though.

And I got more likes for that.  I didn't go back and read any other responses because I knew I would just get sucked into an argument.  I wasn't in the mood to argue last night.  I just felt like I needed to comment and remind people that word choice is important when you're trying to call someone out or make a point.

But just to make sure I wasn't mistaken about what a cunt actually is, I looked it up.  This is the definition of the word cunt according to

Usage alert

All senses of this word are vulgar slang and are very strongly tabooed and censored. The meanings that refer to a woman and a contemptible person are used with disparaging intent and are perceived as highly insulting and demeaning. There are many words used to refer to people in sexual terms. However, to call a person a cunt, especially a woman, is one of the most hateful and powerful examples of verbal abuse in the English language. See also gash1.
noun, Slang: Vulgar.

1. the vulva or vagina.
2. Extremely Disparaging and Offensive. a contemptuous term used to refer to a woman. a term used to refer to a contemptible person.  (interesting that part of a woman's body, the part where babies come from, is also a term for a "contemptible person".)
3. sexual intercourse with a woman.

The note above explains that it is especially hateful to call a woman a cunt.  I would disagree with that.  I think it's even worse to call a man a cunt because you're disparaging him by referring to him as part of a woman's body.  It's kind of like an extreme example of telling a male that he runs or throws like a girl.  It implies that men are always better than women are, if only because they don't have big stinky vaginas to contend with.  That's a major insult to men, especially since they're using a word that is considered one of the most offensive in the English language.  Women own their cunts.  It's a part of who they are.  A man who is a cunt isn't a man; he's a "sissy" girl with a big stinky vagina.

I think it's interesting that "cunt" is so often used as an insult.  There's no denying that a woman's cunt is powerful, even if it's only powerfully malodorous.  Many men will do a lot of things to get one of their body parts inside a woman's cunt.  Most people enter their lives via a woman's cunt.  And yet, that word is frequently used to debase, humiliate, and denigrate other people.  In many countries, a woman's cunt is so powerful it's customary for it to be mutilated.

The word "cunt" doesn't really bother me that much.  I probably wouldn't appreciate being called a cunt, but then I don't ever enjoy being insulted by other people.  I don't know that I consider the word cunt to be more offensive than any other insulting term.  But to many women, the word "cunt" is considered "fightin' words".  I would imagine most men would prefer not to be called a cunt, either.

So... it seems to me that if you're going to call someone out for being mean to a plus sized woman for wearing a bikini, you'd do better to use a word other than "cunt" to insult the fat shamer.  After all, the beautiful lady in the bikini is the proud owner of a cunt.... and so is your mother, sister, aunt, daughter, friend, etc...

Just something to think about.

And just because I did like this lady's message, I'm going to share her video here for your perusal.

In other news, today a woman in our local Facebook group asked a German national a question and referred to Americans as "mere English speakers".  This woman is herself an American and probably ought to speak only for herself, since many Americans can speak languages other than English.  But I have to admit that many of her comments cause me to want to throw punches at something.  I am rather sensitive to her posts.  I'm not a fan of ass kissing or fake humility, which is what I think she's engaging in when she refers to "mere English speakers".    


  1. I agree with you on all counts. (I honest-to-god just committed a typo and wrote "I agree with you on all cunts.") My dad would have called the guy a dick. Perhaps that's not much better, but for whatever reason, you don't hear people calling women dicks. Maybe that's because men are perceived as being so superior to women that it wouldn't have quite the sting according to public sentiment. I'd certainly feel insulted at being called a dick. i suppose once I'm involved in an intimate relationship with a guy, I'll actually have a degree of affinity for that particular body part, but I don't yet/

    Some of this makes me wonder just how much I want to get into fB when i reach that magic age of 21 and my mom will hand me 5 grand for not having signed up yet. We've been warned heavily at school about it potentially impacting our careers or the residency programs into which we're acccepted in particular. i suppose I'll use a fake name and avatar, guardd my privacy settings, and only be friends with people who have absolutely nothing to do with my school or have absolutely nothing to do with anyone who has anything to do with our school. it's a social media i don't want to miss out on entirely before it's replaced by the next trend, but i get that things can impact a career. the brass at our school are really big about naming names of others involved in heavy drinking or whatever. i'm not sure what they could do about it if it were true, but we're a private institution, so they cuold find some other reason to bounce us. they told us there's a faculty member for each cohort who monitors the accounts of anyone who posts under a name that can be identified to him or her to the best that the faculty member can access the accounts.No one's ever been bounced, but a lot of people have been counseled. i don't think the school is worried about looking bad. I think they're genuinely concerned about both us ruining our own chances at success or especially about one of us screwing something up for someone else.

    Once we're in an intership or internship/resdiency program, unless our settings are totally public and we're blogging about sellling illegal drugs or having sex with animals or those too young to consent or we're involved in kiddy porn (and who wuld be son stupid?), I don't think anyone -- either our residency supervisors or future employers -- cares all that much. I admit, though, that I track my doctors through my aunt's FB account as much as their settings or those of their "friends" will allow.

    1. Thanks... you just helped me get over writer's block. I need to make a post.

  2. I keeo trying to type this and falling asleep.; amyway, probably only the grandmas' feelings would be hurt, though others would think woy words were very mean. Postin here is safe, but the only rad my blog. if i try to get them to read someone sle's blog, theyhave to be forced or I have to read it to them.

    Anyway, thy won't know I'm saying that poor little camille cathereine, looks a little like Dwight David Eisenhower with s smaterring of brom baby hair on op for her haird. My dad thinks she's acrially a preemie, nut he and my mom agre (and they agree inso few nice things about me) thatt I was actually a pretty abby for a prreemie. They say i loooked like a midsided cheap plastic baby dillw, I was too small to look lik the rregular sized ones, My parrents agree that I was an acceptable looking baby even for a preemie, which seems to fhey typically look
    Antway, Baby camille is skinny and has a pained expression, When she looks at you she looks as though she's giving you the stinke eye or plotting their untimely demiise''An older nurse who knows a lot of things that you'rre never gpoint to learn in nursing or med school said that her eyes won't stay blue but probabl turn hazel slowly. she'll be bloue-eyed for a couple of years, rtehn they're graduall

    I'm reaally too tired to be typing this because I keep messing it up andlosing it and having to start over, but here it goes

    baby Caamille is one ugly baby/ i thoght she eas the ugliest baby ever born until I wlked into the nICU and say the competition; hell, she'd be miss america if she were running against those little space aliens.

    a nurse, one of those older ones who has seen or heard everything at least once, says that her hair will lighter and throughout her life her haird will be closer to blonde than brown, thuogh dishwater blone, never a towhead liked her daddy. the nurse says her eyes will stay blue fore= three or four fearsm then skwkt ryeb gazel. Dhe says real hair, oncw it comes in at about 1 1/2, whill be curly. She saits she'kk be adorbale, I din't know if she's like a fortune tekkrt orr if she;s observing things any nurse with 43 years of experience would see.

    begardless, That baby looks kind of like o Holocaust victimm in one of the concentration camps, Jillian says she's not pretty, nut it's one thing for her ro sat that and another matter entirely forr for me to insult the baby's appearance. But gisg, she's ugly.


    1. My goodness, Alexis. You must be exhausted.


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