Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Don't know too many "Dicks" anymore...

Today's post is inspired by Time Hop.  Time Hop is an app that tracks your posts on Facebook and shows you what you were sharing with social media in years past.  Apparently, on June 9, 2013, I posted this...

I blogged about this two years ago, too.  I try to keep things light when I can and I don't always have the right topics on the brain to do that.  The name Dick is one of those things I can joke about.  This post is also not like the previous one.  Actually, I think the post I wrote about this subject two years ago is more interesting than today's post is.  

When I was a kid, I knew a few guys named Dick.  They were mostly friends of my parents.  I am also old enough to remember Dick Cavett, Dick Van Patten, Dick Van Dyke, and Dick Clark.  Dick was also a popular character name on TV shows and in movies.  It's short for Richard and has that nice hard sound.

At some point, "dick" became a euphemism for penis.  And people stopped calling their kids Dick.  I don't remember the last time a new mom introduced her son Dick to me.  In fact, I'm not sure it's ever happened.  Any kid called Dick today would definitely have to learn how to fight.  That's almost as bad as naming your son Sue.

Johnny Cash sings about Sue...

In 2013, the above post got some funny comments.  When I shared it yesterday, it got even more funny comments.  One woman commented both in 2013 and 2015 that the name Dick is short for Richard.  I have to admit, that comment annoyed me a little bit.  I mean, of course I know that Dick is short for Richard.  I was just kidding.  But then she reminded me that she has Asperger's and takes things a little too literally sometimes.  I have a bit of a thin skin, too.  What I don't have is friends named Dick.  

I don't know too many Dicks anymore.  Several of my friends made comments to the contrary.  I think the best comment came from a new friend from the Stuttgart area, who said she lives with a dick, but that's not his name.  Most everyone else made comments about the dicks in their lives.  

I can honestly say that I don't live with a dick.  Bill is ridiculously kind and considerate to me.  When my car was in the shop, he didn't want to bother me by asking me to taking him to the train station early in the morning.  I had to remind him that I'd be awake anyway and he'd happily take me to the station if I needed him to.  It's the least I can do for him.  And hell, I'm awake anyway and need to do something to earn my keep besides writing blog posts and being cute.

I think it's funny that I ended up with such a nice, generous guy.  I have all these friends who dated a lot and ended up with guys who turned out to be immature jerks.  I never dated and people thought I was nuts and I ended up with a guy who treats me like a queen.  But then, I doubt I'd stay with someone who didn't treat me well.  I'd rather be alone and I have spent enough time alone to know I can do it.

And he cleans up nice, too...
Yep... it's safe to say I don't know many dicks...


  1. Over Memorial Day, my family and houseguests were trying to think of tho youngest erson called Dick that any of us knew. The youngest, as besrt my dad could calculate it, would be 53.

    In the first of my mom's two years of teaching elementaary school, she had a little boy show up on the second day of class. He had been sent because of overflow from a nearby school, and it was no coincidence that ht e kid was the one chosen to leave, my mom said she could tell in the first two minutes that he was a holy terror.

    The first words he spoke to my mom were, "Where's the shit house?"

    My mom answered, "We call it ''the bathroom',' and it's right here, she said, touching the door.of the little boys' restroom. The mom smiled proudly as though they had been practicing that line at home all summer.

    The little boy's name was John R'ichard Mills [surname obviously changed to protect the guilty].. . The mom saw from the labels on the cubbies that there was another John in the class. This concerned her. she said, "We could have the kids call him 'Dick.' "

    My mom said she was so tempted to say, "Yes, let's call him ' Dick' " but instead, she convinced the mom it would be OK to have more than one John in the same class. She said she called him "Dick" under her breath all year.

  2. P.S. Imagine reading "Dick and Jane and Sally" books with today's kids.

  3. I never read Dick and Jane because I went to kindergarten in England and we had our own weird learn to read books there. I used to have my British reader and it's so funny to read it now because it's full of British words and spellings.

    That's a funny story about that kid... "Where's the shithouse?" Hilarious!

  4. I didn't read basal readers, either, but my mom went through both the Scott-Foresman series w/ Dick, Jane,, Sally, and thwir dog Spot, , and the Ginn basic readers featuring tom, Betty, Susan, and their dog Flip.

    My mom grew up in the day when you went through all the books and accompanying workbooks whether you could read them before you got to them or not. Evfen the top group could only move so fast, and those Tom, betty, Dick, Jane, et al books must have been pretty damned important in the curriculum if every child had to read through every one of them even if he or she was reading teen novels and non-fiction books about the Kennedys at home.


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