Friday, April 10, 2015

Suspected swingers at the bowling alley...

No, I can't bowl like Fred Flintstone...

If there's one thing every military installation seems to have, it's bowling alleys.  They all seem to look the same, too.  I don't know why bowling is so popular among military folks.  I'm not very good at it myself, though Bill and I have gone a few times.  We both tend to bowl better when we drink.

This morning, I am reminded of an incident that occurred at Fort Belvoir's bowling alley maybe ten or so years ago.  Back then, Bill and I were broke and we needed to find cheap ways of entertaining ourselves.  We happened to live on Fort Belvoir, so there was a bowling alley that we could conceivably walk to if we wanted.  One Sunday afternoon, we were bored and decided we wanted to go bowling.

Bowling alleys on military posts tend to be full of kids.  They're noisy, boisterous places where one can enjoy a greasy cheeseburger, cheap beer, and other assorted fattening snacks.  But we just couldn't take another afternoon of watching TV.  

There was an interracial couple in the lane next to ours.  They were very good bowlers.  The male half, a handsome black man, was especially good.  I couldn't help but watch him as he gracefully and effortlessly sent bowling ball after bowling ball down the lane, getting strikes more often than not.  

At one point, he noticed me noticing him.  I was truly only admiring his bowling prowess, but I think he might have gotten the idea that perhaps I was admiring him.  He was a good looking guy, but I am happily married and he appeared to be as well.  Or, at least it was obvious he was part of a couple.

Anyway, this guy started watching me bowl.  It's not too exciting to watch me at the bowling alley because I suck.  But I noticed him watching me.  I caught his eye and he gave me a flirtatious grin.  I immediately felt uncomfortable.  I've never been much of a flirt and, again, I'm married and not looking for another man in my life.

The couple finished their game before we did.  I was a little relieved and hoped a mom and kids would show up to take over their lane.  But then they hung around for a bit, watching us...  I finally said something to Bill, who glanced at the guy.  He seemed to take the hint and left.

Later, we went home and I took to the Internet.  At that time, I had no blog and Facebook wasn't yet a household name.  I asked some friends who were members of a second wives and stepmoms group what they thought was going on.  They all said they thought the guy and his wife were probably swingers.

Thank God that thought did not occur to me as we were bowling.  I don't know what the guy and his woman were thinking of, but it never crossed my mind that they could be looking for sex partners...  especially in an ungraceful bowler like me.  But maybe the man just enjoyed watching us fumble with our balls.  Clearly, that's a problem he never has.

Here's a bizarre game show that was on TV in the 70s...  The Bradys bowl better than I do.  Props to "Marcia" and "Jan" for not wearing bras. 


  1. I tend to bury my head in the sand and pretend that swingers don't actually exist, but I suppose in real life they do.

    Drunk bowling is a sport i could follow.

    1. Well, it's possible they weren't swingers. But their behavior was rather suspicious.

  2. I'm really glad my parents were never into that sort of thing, or at least kept it extremely well hidden from us if they were into it. this is going to sound incredibly disrespectful from the way I'm referring to them by their first names to what I'm about to say about them, but seriously, i could see Barack and Michelle being into something like that if they had more anonymity.

  3. just something about them gives me that vibe


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