Tuesday, August 19, 2014

George Carlin sorta predicts 9/11...

I'm reposting this review of George Carlin's 1999 CD You Are All Diseased today because I was just reminded of his eerie predictions about global terrorism.  And maybe because we all are diseased...  today, I feel less healthy than I did yesterday.  That's because my chances of getting breast cancer have statistically now doubled.  I probably am diseased.


People are full of shit...

Bear in mind that this review is almost ten years old.  Ten years ago, I was 32 and hoping to become a mother and Bill and I listened to this as we were having sex in an attempt to procreate.  It's been ages since we last had sex and I can't say I miss it that much.  But this album made that particular session more fun than it might have been, even if it didn't ultimately lead to parenthood.  Given how life has turned out for us, maybe that's for the best.  After all, I'm hoping to visit the Starkenberger Beer Pool soon and that's not an altogether kid friendly activity.

Can George Carlin predict the future?

 Nov 27, 2004 (Updated Dec 22, 2007)
Review by   
Rated a Very Helpful Review

    Pros:Very funny and eerie. Can extend your lovemaking sessions.

    Cons:Many people will find Carlin's humor very offensive. May be depressing to some.

    The Bottom Line:Take Carlin's wisdom with a healthy grain of salt and have a good laugh.

    This review may be offensive to some folks... if you're uncomfortable reading about frank sexual situations or irreverent humor you may want to skip it.

    My husband and I listened to comedian George Carlin's 1999 CD You Are All Diseased yesterday... I decided to put it on while we made love, reasoning that a good laugh is always beneficial on the way to an orgasm. Besides, we're trying to conceive and need all the help we can get. Can I just tell you that it's hard to concentrate on sex when you're laughing your ass off? Our whoopie session lasted a lot longer than usual just because of that simple fact. That may be a plus to some people!

    Anyway, on You Are All Diseased, George Carlin is his usual angry, cynical self. Near the beginning of the CD, he talks about airport security and remarks that there's too much of it. He's annoyed that some guy with a double digit IQ and a triple digit income is allowed to root around in his bags in the name of preventing terrorism. He talks about how pointless it is that airline security workers always ask the THREE BIG QUESTIONS-- 1. Did you pack your bag yourself? 2. Did anyone unknown to you ask you to carry anything on board the plane? 3. Has your bag been out of your possession since you packed it? Carlin points out hilarious reasons why the THREE BIG QUESTIONS are ridiculous and offers hysterical answers to the three questions. But what always gets me are his jokes about terrorism. Carlin even offers some insight into what terrorism in the United States could come to--anthrax in the water and bombs in public venues. He actually jokes about ways that people might kill pilots and flight attendants using tools that are readily available on the plane! Bear in mind that this CD was made in 1999, before these jokes would have hit so incredibly close to home!

    It's eerie to listen to this CD because of what happened on September 11, 2001. Carlin jokes about things that did eventually happen two years later. And what happened did very much involve a lapse in air transportation security. Did the terrorists listen to this CD to get their ideas? Is George Carlin privy to intelligence that the CIA is not? I don't think so. But it's interesting in 2004 to listen to Carlin's predictions from 1999. They were jokes back then and now they're reality. Carlin comments that fundamentalists of any religious stripe are going to "make our lives very interesting for years to come". He advises Americans to embrace terrorism and "enjoy the ride". It's not lost on me that some people would be offended and upset by Carlin's observations, especially since he delivers his humor with so much vitriol. But-- even though I don't agree that Americans should embrace terrorism-- I can respect and laugh about Carlin's point of view. My husband, who is a Soldier and was in the Pentagon on September 11, 2001, can also respect Carlin's point of view. It's part of my husband's job as a Soldier to protect the rights of all Americans; when Carlin himself served in the Air Force, it was also part of his job to protect the rights of all Americans as guaranteed under the Constitution. Carlin has the right to speak his mind, even if what he says is shocking and distasteful. Besides, in my opinion, Carlin often makes a lot of sense.

    The rest of this CD is plain hysterical. Carlin busts on Americans for being too soft and obsessed with safety and security. He says that we get a false feeling of safety and security that we get when we make laws and buy products that aim to protect people. He comments that nowadays "kids have to wear helmets to do everything but jerking off" and that "we've taken all the fun out of childhood just in the interest of saving a few lives." And truthfully, he's probably right. How many of us on Epinions thought nothing of riding in the front seat of a car with no seat belt when we were kids? How many of us once enjoyed riding our bikes without wearing a helmet? How many of us used to think nothing of ordering a medium rare hamburger in a restaurant? He points out that so many of the risks that we protect ourselves against are so minor... and he does have a point. On the other hand, tell that to a mother who's lost a child in a car accident or a person who's been disabled by a bike accident or someone who's gotten very sick from eating meat infected with Salmonella.

    Listen to Carlin's diatribe on the American obsession with cleanliness and how we often end up sicker because our immune systems are not exposed to enough germs. Carlin does make good points, albeit in a gross way. He talks about how, when he was a kid in 1940s New York City, he and his friends would swim in the very polluted Hudson River to cool off. At this time in American history, everybody was concerned with polio and thousands of kids were dying or being crippled by it. But no one in Carlin's neighborhood ever got polio. Why? He surmises that it's because its because his and his friends' immune systems were tempered in shit. The Hudson was full of raw sewage.

    Anyone who's familiar with George Carlin knows that the man frequently presents offensive viewpoints and uses enough blue language to make a sailor blush. I have to admit that even though I don't always agree with George Carlin, I can appreciate his sense of logic. Carlin is a keen observer of life-- in a strictly realist point of view. For example, he says that children are overrated. Our society has become obsessed with doing everything "for the children" and making everything "about the children". But, as Carlin points out in a less than politically correct way, this rose colored view of children ignores the fact that children who are indulged too much grow up to be self-centered people with no sense of reality or self-preservation. Carlin asks, "What ever happened to survival of the fittest and natural selection? The kid that eats too many marbles doesn't grow up to have kids of his own?" Once again, he has a point... but he ignores the emotional equation. How would the parent of such a child feel about it? I don't think Carlin is so insensitive that he doesn't have an inkling of how he comes across... he's just pointing out absurdities that exist in our world. It's food for thought that not everyone will want to taste, but it's great that it's there for those who do want to sample it.

    Some other highpoints on this CD are Carlin's ideas of what to do with guys who are big jerks (especially the ones who wear muscle shirts and no deodorant), whether or not there is a God (nope, not according to Carlin), and fun new cable channels (I loved the "Willie Nelson" tunes). Yes, I thought the CD was funny... outrageous, offensive, and decidedly unPC. Frankly, I often get tired of political correctness and find it refreshing to hear Carlin's unabashed point of view.

    My father hates George Carlin. He thinks he's disrespectful, crude, and unpatriotic, and I would often be subjected to long boring lectures whenever my dad would catch me watching Carlin on television. My mother, ironically, introduced me to the world of George Carlin when I joined her as she watched him on an HBO special. When I pointed out to her that she's a Carlin fan, she shushed me and let me know that she didn't want the world to know that she liked the man's comedy. George Carlin's humor is not for everyone, especially those who take what he says literally. And frankly, although I think he's funny, I probably wouldn't recommend listening to his routines during a depressive episode, unless of course you subscribe to the idea that misery loves company. The man is angry and pessimistic-- he might make you laugh, but he might also make you angry too. If you're lucky, he might also inspire you to think and look at another point of view that is not so likely to be pleasant but is entirely likely to be pretty realistic.

    The sound quality on You Are All Diseased is good and the disc runs for about an hour. As far as extras go, there aren't any. The CD is not enhanced, nor do the liner notes contain any cool trivia. What you get when you purchase this CD is Carlin himself, nothing more, nothing less. If you like George Carlin's brand of humor, I don't think you'll be displeased with this disc, although you might be shocked by what he says about terrorism.

    Recommend this product? Yes

    Great Music to Play While: Romancing

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