Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Alienation of Affection laws... what utter bollocks...

Yeah, I am an American not a Brit, but I thought I'd be kind and not use the word "bullshit" in the title of my post.  Watching a Dr. Phil rerun this morning and there's a woman on who sued her ex husband's mistress for "alienation of affection".  Basically, what this means is that she sued the woman her ex husband was cheating with for "stealing her husband" from her.

I have often written in this blog that I understand why people get angry with the other woman or the other man for being "homewreckers".  However, while I understand the sentiment, I think that ultimately the person who ought to be held responsible is the man or woman who made the commitment, not the person who attracted them and led them astray.  Even if someone is acting like a whore and trying to get your man or woman to stray, that person is not the one who promised to be true to you.  So while I think it makes sense to be pissed off at people who do their best to break up a family, I think that ultimately, the person who should be held responsible is the husband or wife who made the decision to give in to temptation.

What I think is scary about Alienation of Affection laws is that they set a nasty precedent for people who just want revenge.  Sometimes relationships die, for whatever reason.  It may not be because some woman swooped in and acted like a hussy.  Sometimes people who are married just fall out of affection for each other.  It happens all the time.  If they are fortunate enough to find someone else with whom they are compatible before they are divorced, a law like this can serve as a nasty tool for the jilted ex... even if the relationship was doomed anyway.

Granted, if my husband went out and fucked some woman and gave me a disease or something, I'd be very angry.  But it would be HIM I'd really be mad at, not the other woman.  He would be the one I'd want to pay for the indiscretion, not his woman on the side.  Ultimately, if he was screwing around on me, he'd be the one breaking a promise, not her.  And chances would be good that eventually she would be his victim, too.  So while I wouldn't think highly of her, ultimately I should probably feel sorry for her.  Many people who cheat will do it again.

Besides, it's really difficult for people to "steal" other peoples' affections.  If the other person is a competent adult, he or she eventually had to go willingly... although I do understand there are toxic people out there who make a concerted effort to break people up.  It's up to the committed person

Today, I'm headed to the dentist for a cleaning and my crown.  It's raining and chilly.  I might even need a jacket.  Last night, I was sweating in my office, trying to use my new mic, which I don't think is as good as the old one is.  This isn't to say it's a "bad" piece of equipment.  It's just not as good as I was hoping it would be.

Just as I'm finishing this post, I am inspired to write another...  Stay tuned!

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