Monday, May 14, 2012

My husband's ex wife is now a "public figure"...

Yesterday was Mother's Day.  Given what happened last Mother's Day, I opted not to call my mom.  I sent her some music, though, a CD and a book of piano music she can practice if she feels so inclined.  We talked last week and I'll probably give her a ring later this week because we're planning to take a military hop and who knows where we'll end up.

My husband called his mom and his stepmom to wish them a happy day.  The call with his mom went fine.  Then he talked to his dad and stepmom, both of whom asked if he'd heard from his daughters recently.  Of course he hasn't.  They haven't spoken to him in over seven years.

So my husband's stepmom said that she had seen a picture of my husband's younger daughter at her "prom" (more likely an LDS dance she attended) on the ex's husband's Facebook.  There was a caption on the photo that read that he intended to adopt my husband's daughters "very soon".  Naturally, stepmother-in-law and father-in-law were upset about this development.  Father-in-law was very hurt and confused, not understanding what benefit the girls would get from being adopted.  I think the only benefit they'd get is a hearty "fuck you" to their bio-dad, who used to wipe their asses when they were in diapers and paid their mother generous child support so their loser stepfather didn't have to work a job.

After ringing off, my husband logged out of Facebook and searched for his ex-wife's husband.  He found his profile and there he noticed a clickable link that said "The most inspiring person in my life".  When my husband clicked the link, he was taken to his ex wife's "public figure" page.  Yes, that's right... my husband's delusional ex wife now thinks of herself as a public figure!  I guess she's planning to run for public office or something.

I have noticed over the past year or so, my husband's ex wife has been putting stuff out there on the Internet that is more and more provocative.  It's my guess that she's putting this stuff out there hoping to provoke a response from someone in my husband's family or my husband himself.  Whether or not the stuff she's putting out there is true remains to be seen.  But I do think she puts it out there because she seeks attention and is hoping for some kind of dramatic response that shows that someone still cares about the hateful things she does.

I suppose that if my husband's daughters want to be adopted and that would make them feel better about this whole situation, they have every right to do so.  However, it seems to me that getting adopted, especially when they will almost certainly get married eventually, is a big waste of time and money and they will eventually regret it.  My husband's ex wife has been through three husbands and she has yet to allow any of them to be around for their children's adolescences.

Moreover, if she allows #3 to become the legal father to my husband's daughters, she will burn any hope of ever reconciling with my husband's family.  I have noticed that no one in her sphere ever stays married and she probably assumes my husband and I will eventually split.  If we ever did split, that would potentially clear the way for her to try to reconcile with my husband's family.  But if those girls get adopted, that will never happen.  Of course, I don't intend to divorce my husband, so maybe ex is smart just to cut her losses and glom on to #3's family.

It also would not surprise me if my husband's ex wife put her husband up to posting that link on his page.  When she was married to my husband, she used to try to goad him into doing dramatic and demonstrative things to prove his love for her.  She would play "Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman" by Bryan Adams and tell him that he needed to demonstrate his love to her the way Bryan Adams said he should...

    


To this day, my husband hates the song "Strong Enough To Be My Man" by Sheryl Crow, because his ex wife used to play it for him and compare him to the man Sheryl sings about...




I have been with my husband for going on ten years and I think he's wonderful.  He tells me every day that he loves me.  He shows me more love and affection than I could have ever wished for.  I could not have asked for a better husband and I truly believe that if he couldn't make his ex happy, no one could.  But she is very narcissistic and I'm sure loving her and assuaging her ego is like trying to fill an endless pit.  While I have no love for #3, I do feel slightly sorry for him.  When he stops being useful to her, he'll be cast aside and forgotten too.

So anyway, I think all this is just her trying to show us that she's moving on and thriving.  If that's true, good on her.  And truly, if the girls think being adopted by their mother's THIRD husband will make them happy, then I think they should go ahead and get adopted... and leave us alone once and for all.  

And if she does run for public office, I kind of hope some inquisitive news reporter does some digging into her past...    

4 comments:

  1. Good lord, she sounds like a real winner. I wonder if she's driving her third husband mad too and he's just hiding it well, or whether she fits right into his own worldview too?

    Not that it matters. The sooner you don't have to even think about them, the better.

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  2. Hi Dave! Frankly, I think her third husband was crazy when they got married. He was so clearly a consolation prize it wasn't funny. When my husband told his ex he was going to propose to me, she said "Well... #3 has asked me three times to marry him. I guess I'll tell him we can get married now." They were married in two months and she was pregnant within four.

    That's pretty much her pattern. When she married my husband, she claimed her birth control wasn't working. She got pregnant just weeks after they tied the knot. Same story with her first husband.

    This whole experience has been incredibly painful for both my husband and me. But I'm seriously at the point at which I would welcome seeing those kids getting adopted because it will mean they won't be coming back. That's more than the ex's first husband can say... she got my husband to "adopt" her oldest kid (a son), though they never did it legally. She just got his name changed somehow. Fifteen years later, when she wanted to completely alienate my husband from his "son", she got him reacquainted with his real dad... the same man she claimed was an abusive drunk.

    Yeah, she's a piece of work.

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  3. Sounds like you're being charitable with "piece of work." She sounds like a Grade A bitch.

    Hopefully she'll go forward with all of that and they can be out of your life forever.

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  4. LOL... Being charitable where she's concerned is rare for me. I usually refer to her as a first class cunt.

    I think if they move forward with their plans, it will at least give us closure. But it will also break my husband's and his parents' hearts. And no doubt, if you asked the ex, she would blame me for all of this destructive bullshit she does.

    It's nice to know I'm so powerful!

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