Monday, April 11, 2011

Feeling a little like Fergie...

No, not the Black-eyed Peas Fergie... the original Fergie, Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York (or whatever the fuck she's calling herself these days).  It's been in the news lately that Fergie was snubbed by William and Kate and didn't score an invite to their nuptials.  I understand Wills decided not to invite his uncle's ex wife because he considered her a disgrace.  Granted, she's done some pretty disgrace-worthy stuff, like having her toes sucked on a St. Tropez beach and offering some reporters access to Prince Andrew for money.  But Wills invited Andrew and Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie to his wedding.  He dissed Fergie.

Well... like ol' Fergie, I was dissed by a family member.  One of my cousins got married yesterday and it seems I'm one of the few people in my family who didn't get an invite.  This particular cousin was also a Facebook friend until today.  I decided to delete her, mainly because I got the feeling we were only "friends" superficially.

Now... it may seem silly that this snub would piss me off.  After all, I doubt we would have attended the wedding, since we just moved into our new house a week ago.  But it's still pretty hurtful to see pictures of my relatives who did attend, plastered all over my feed.  It would have been nice to have had the choice, especially since this particular relative was invited to my wedding... which apparently was a lot less important than a volleyball game.

This action of snubbing has caused me to do some thinking about my family as a whole.  I used to have a lot of warm feelings toward them.  But as I get older, I start to see things differently than I used to.  I start to feel like there's a lot of fakeness.

Take, for instance, an email I got recently from my older sister.  She's 13 years older than I am and I hardly know her.  She has two kids, one of whom is twelve years old going on 21.  Anyway, this sister sent me not one, but TWO, forwarded emails from my nephew, asking for money to support his lacrosse team.  I would have been happy to help out... except for the fact that this kid didn't think enough of me to email me himself.  I'm his aunt, for God's sake.  Even if he'd sent me the mass email himself, I probably would have been inclined to help.  But getting a mass email sent to me by my sister didn't sit well with me... and frankly, I'm surprised she did that for him.  For most of my life, she's berated me for being lazy... and yet she does this for her son.

And take, for instance, the surprise package I got from my favorite aunt.  It was a picture of me and my parents.  I was fifteen years old and had been dragged kicking and screaming to our church, where I was forced to be photographed for the church directory.  My parents then gave prints of this picture to various family members.  Well, this aunt decided that I should have this picture back...  I could tell it had been kept in the attic or something.  It was all warped and there was still a picture hanger stapled to the wire on the back, so no one ever proudly displayed it in their home.  It was probably stored under a pile of junk.  She mailed it back to me as if I should be grateful to have it.

I threw it away.  It was in bad condition and besides, my mother had already given me a larger framed copy of that picture.  I wish my aunt had thrown it away.  I never would have been the wiser.

So yeah, I feel like Fergie these days... and am thinking that maybe my family should get smaller.

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